Book of Secrets and more!

Childhood Memories

2011-09-11T17:22:00.000-07:00

Yes, the blog is back. Hooray. Anyway, I'm a nostalgic freak who is obsessed with the 90s (because I was born in the 90s), and I want to talk about my favorite childhood memories.

Oh yeah, and I'll talk about the stuff I've recently written at another point.

Anyway, let's start off with something that I have always, always, always loved: computers. Yes, believe it or not, I've been using computers since I was 4 years old (I still have the first computer I ever used in my room, and it still works). I grew up using Windows 95, one of my favorite operating systems of all time (...Favorite operating system? Wow, I'm a geek!). When my dad bought a new computer, he kept the old one in storage as a backup and bought a Windows 98 SE computer (SE stands for Second Edition). That was our family computer, as was the old Windows 95, but for a much shorter amount of time. 56K Dial-Up and AOL became too slow for my dad's needs, so we got a high-speed DSL service instead. Unfortunately, our computer was too old to handle high-speed internet, causing the computer to not work at all and my dad to cry (it was the only time I have ever heard him cry). It still worked otherwise, but I never used it (and never even liked it, for that matter), so we kept it in storage until recently, when we donated it.

So, now that I've bored you with talk of old computers, let's move on to a more exciting topic: old books.

Kidding! Old books is an even less exciting topic, which I'm still going to talk about.

We had this set of "Help Your Child to Read" books by Allan Ahlberg and Eric Hill, such as Double Ducks, Poorly Pig, and Bad Bear. I loved them, but as I grew older, I no longer needed them. I was cleaning my room one day and idiotically decided to throw all of them out.

What a dumb**s I was.

Those books are rare, rare, rare! They're out-of-print, and they're worth hundreds--sometimes even thousands--of dollars if they're in the right condition! Dang.

Well, that's why there's Paperback Swap, and there's also my wonderful sister. Knowing I loved that book, and missed it so much, she looked on the aforementioned Paperback Swap (a website devoted to trading books for books) and lo and behold, there it was. She bought it for me and I decided to look and see if there were any others, too. They are all--I repeat, all--on Amazon, and they generally don't cost as much as they used to. Some of them are labeled "Out of print--limited quantities" or something to that effect, but still for a decent price. I will be getting my childhood back, one book at a time.

Now let's move on to toys (okay, I know you're bored of this, so go read another blog or something). My absolute favorite toy when I was four was the Playskool Talkback Voice Recorder. I have tried looking for this and have not found any results at all. I still have it somewhere, but the batteries desperately need changing, and they're button-cells.

Speaking of Playskool, I remember a book/toy hybrid called the "Magic Touch Book". I had the Winnie the Pooh one, "The Surprise Party Surprise". Here's a reenactment of the sound that played when you turned it on:

(really catchy, although ridiculously simple, music)

Welcome to your Magic Touch Book!

Open the book. Press the PageHopper! Then, touch a picture!

I always made fun of the way it said this. The guy they got to do this intro had some sort of accent, so "Your" sounded British, "Then" sounded southern, and "Touch" sounded like a combination of "Touch" and "Dodge" (Todge?). And he just sounded way too excited to be doing intros to kids' books.

Now, obviously, this was intended to help kids to read, but I would always turn it on, listen to the intro, and play the activities. That's one thing Living Books and Disney Animated Storybooks didn't have: you were forced to read with those, but with the Magic Touch Books, all you had to do was, as it said, "Open the book, press the PageHopper [a little character Playskool made up so the book knew what page you were on], then, todge a PICTURE!" No reading involved. That's why I loved it, and that's why it failed. It's also why I can't find it anywhere online, either: no one had the Winnie the Pooh one, just the 101 Dalmatians one (which I saw at Toys "R" Us once).

But I will get this one back, just so I can hear Kanga tell me that I've "made a... Honey. Honey. Honey. SURPRIIIIIIIISE cake!"

"Yippeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"

"Todge a PICTURE!"

Well, I'm boring myself at this point; I may as well start a new blog where I talk about stuff I remember from when I was a kid. Until then, I'll keep this one and do random updates!

-Johnny

Hey, a blog!

2011-07-04T18:52:00.000-07:00

Oh, right, it's my blog. And it's dead. R.I.P., blog.

-Johnny

R.I.P. Ron Santo

2010-12-03T20:39:00.000-08:00

A former Cub and my favorite sports commentator, as well as a local Chicago celebrity. May he rest in piece.

My reaction: Holy...!

...Yeah, that's basically an inside joke. The joke was that whenever someone messed up in a Cubs game (this happened a lot), Ron would say, "Aw," or "Holy," or something like that, and then we'd hear dead air. We imagined that he swore.

Well, now the air is not the only thing that's dead. I certainly will miss the most energetic Cubbie I had ever heard.

-Johnny

R.I.P. Leslie Nielsen

2010-11-29T19:35:00.000-08:00

Yes, Leslie Nielsen is, in fact, dead. He will be missed, but I have the last word: FUSCHTA!

And if you don't know what that's from, go watch "Dracula: Dead and Loving It." Now.

-Johnny

My stuff!

2010-11-26T16:17:00.000-08:00

Yeah, I'm going to be taking a looooooooooong break. Tune in in another month.

-Johnny

Quick Update!

2010-11-17T15:16:00.000-08:00

I haven't done much writing recently, so I won't be updating for a while. If I don't update before Saturday, that's why.

-Johnny

Daily Work: Expanding on First Draft!

2010-11-15T18:29:00.000-08:00

Yes, I am adding more things to the first draft of the Magic Hotel book! I actually started in the middle, and I'm adding stuff afterwards.

The final product, I guarantee, will look great! Keep checking back when I'm willing to share more information than you already know...

-Johnny

Writing on Sunday

2010-11-14T14:55:00.000-08:00

In the month since I last wrote about writing, I have done lots of writing. I've done brainstorming on the hotel one, including characters and a plot! I've done nothing on Gimbalda or anything else, and it's likely that most, if not all, of the others will be dropped, unless people really like the Magic Hotel book. Oh man, this is going to be great! Here's a little plot summary:

A group of elementary school kids are all part of the same club. They all have disabilities, and their favorite teacher is the mom of two of them (again with the odd wording). They have all been bullied--several times, in fact--and the teacher is really worried. The principal says he's been doing something to fix it, but it seems to be getting worse. The teacher finally decides they all need a break, so she takes their entire group to a hotel, with the principal's reluctant permission.

At the hotel, they meet a very kindly old man; he's the manager and he's very happy to see them because business has been doing bad. Customers had been complaining about strange things going on at the hotel. The kids love it, and naturally decide to investigate (after all, they believe in the supernatural). They soon discover a portal to an alternate universe, ruled by an evil overlord. He has a secret identity on Earth, and it's shocking who!

So, that's the one book; I've been focusing on that one for the most part, not at all on Gimbalda, and on the others a very little bit. Any suggestions are appreciated!

-Johnny

OKAY, bookworm!

2010-11-13T11:58:00.000-08:00

"Now you're really starting to annoy me! Get back to your cell, before I turn you into a... CHIPMUNK!!"

Don't know what I was referencing?

It's for the better.

Well, seeing as I have nothing to write about, this will be the "and more" part of "Book of Secrets and more".

My family has just finished remodeling my room, plus I have had HUGE amounts of homework (and I've been forgetting about the blog again), so I haven't really been updating. So, here's a feature I'm calling "Weekly Top 10"!

Every week, I'll pick a topic to do a Top 10 list on. This week, it's the Top 10 Products I Don't Want to Buy.

10: Xbox 360 Kinect.

Something you should know about me: I love my Nintendo, but I'm very open-minded. I went into Best Buy today and I tried out their Kinect Adventures demo. Boy, did I not want to admit that I had fun--I mean, boy, did I not have fun. ...Okay, yes, I had a little bit of fun playing, but the pictures that it takes of you without letting you know, which are then published to the internet, certainly didn't show it. Not to mention, there's a 2-second lag. And those are just two problems I noticed with it; I could do a top 10 on all of Kinect's problems and still leave of some!

9: The Goldeneye remake on the Wii.

It's simple: I'm not really interested in Goldeneye. *booing and hissing* Hey, stop! While I do think it would be cool to be able to play as the villain, plus it's a remake of a highly acclaimed N64 game, it's just not my thing. Go ahead and call me "soft-core", I don't care!

8: Any Apple products

*booing and hissing* Okay, stop. Where did I even get this audience, anyway? No one ever reads this blog! Anyway, I honestly do not hate Apple products; it's just that they're too freaking expensive! I mean, come on, Apple! A MacBook Pro costs as little as $1,200! Granted, it uses a Core i5 or i7, but I saw a Windows-based laptop with Core i5, a 15-inch screen, and a freaking Blu-Ray drive for the same price! As for the iPad, that's just too expensive in general, plus I already have an iPod Touch, which I will also not be replacing with the extremely tempting awesomeness that is the 4th generation Touch.

7: Norton Anti-Virus

This one is actually based on experience: my dad's old computer had Norton. Before that, it ran fine. After we got it, the Task Manager always showed us that the CPU was being hogged by "svchost.exe", a file included with almost every anti-virus program with the intent of searching for viruses whenever your computer is on, and doesn't go away even when the program is uninstalled, nor can it be deleted manually (because it's located in a folder you'd never think of looking in). When he installed Avast, a much better, faster program, it was too late, and Avast would never--I say, never ever--run a virus check when you wanted it too! Since I already have Avast, I don't need to worry about it.

6: Anything exclusive to Wal-Mart, Target, or Kmart.

Why not? Because I am boycotting those places! Why am I? Because of their grocery sections! They introduced grocery sections, which are taking down stores that are primarily grocery stores, like Jewel-Osco, Aldi, Meijer, and Certi-Saver (and don't forget the almost non-existent SuperValu).

5: Any phone other than Virgin Mobile

No, not even Sprint, the company that owns VM! Virgin Mobile has been great to us and our entire family, and even if I were to get a new phone for myself, I would probably get their only--their only--pay as you go phone. And why? Because everyone else requires contracts for good-quality phones, even Sprint! Boost has cheap phones at cheap prices, but VM has great phones at... fair prices.

4: A Blu-Ray player

Because I still like DVD, that's why.

3: Sony Vegas

Too expensive and I don't want to use keygens.

2: Google TV

Internet on your TV? Why, that's so crazy, it just might be crazy and stupid!

And the number one product I don't want to buy: PlayStation Move

As I said at #10, I am a die-hard Nintendo fan. Like Kinect, I tried out Move some time last month. It felt exactly like using the Wii. Also, the Move controller looks almost exactly like the Wiimote. It had smooth movement and was, also like Kinect, sort of fun to play. Unfortunately, Sony copied from Nintendo again with Move, so I'm way better off sticking with my pal, the Wii.

So there you go: Kinect, Goldeneye, Apple, Norton, superstore products, any cell phones that aren't from Virgin, Blu-Ray, Sony Vegas, Google TV, and the PSMove. Tomorrow I'll be back with stuff related to writing (I hope!).

-Johnny

Must... write... MOAR!!

2010-10-10T15:16:00.000-07:00

And yes, I misspelled "more". I did that on purpose.

So, I've come up with so many ideas, I can't possibly list them all here. Since I can't have any direct download links on a blog, and my website is dead, I'll just have to sum up some stuff here:

*I have characters in the Magic Hotel book

*The Chronicles of the Dragon Keeper series is in need of a new title

*The Book of Secrets series is also in need of a new title

*Gimbalda is the final series title for something that I'll go into more detail about soon... keep checking back!
*The book about superheroes who are killed by the government needs a title. Period.

Tomorrow, it's not likely I'll post anything because I'll be at Six Flags with my sister and her boyfriend. So check back next Saturday for MOAR!!

Bi-monthly!

2010-10-05T14:47:00.001-07:00

Okay, not really.

Since I have finally found a way to do my homework and still have time for blog posts, I shall try to remember to do this daily.

Anyway, my planned books (now up to five) are:

*The Book of Secrets (tentative title)

*Chronicles of the Dragon Keeper (tentative title)

*Untitled book about superheroes who are killed by the government

*Untitled book about elementary school kids who get sent to a hotel with a mystery

*Gimbalda: Gate to the Golden Land (tentative title)

Any suggestions are greatly appreciated! Tomorrow I will have more details about the first untitled book (about the superheroes).

-Johnny

SWEET MOTHER ****!

2010-05-29T12:15:00.001-07:00

I have been up to NOTHING for a long time!

Well, that's actually a lie, but still... I have been posting nothing for a while, at least. I have been up to things: school, school, filming, writing, playing video games, and... did I mention school?

So yeah, I've been writing stuff, but the format for the post gets weird when I copy and paste from Word, so I'm not doing that.

Yet.

SOON, or so I hope, I will have stuff here... but y0u'll have to wait for that!

-Johnny

Bi-weekly!

2010-02-28T21:34:00.000-08:00

Yes, I have decided that this blog will be updated every other week, if I can think of anything to put here.

This week, I have an excerpt from the Book of Secrets!

Oh yeah, I should explain that, shouldn't I? Before we get to the excerpt, let's rewind a bit, shall we...?

It's night. I'm having a dream. In this dream, I am a girl looking for her cat. Every time she looks, a new one appears. She finds it and picks it up, then says "There you are, you silly little cat named Frankenstein!" I give myself a face-palm when I wake up. Why did I say that? But I think the rest of it was awesome, and in my head I come up with a few other twists and turns, and an actual plot!

The following is not that scene:

“The most popular and most powerful spell,” Mattison said, in the children’s bedroom where they were safe, “as you know, is Anate Maroke. This spell can be used not only for transportation, but for many other things as well.”

“Are you saying we could just say THAT to convince our parents to come back with us?” Max asked.

Mattison shook his head. “I’m afraid that you can’t learn that as a spell until you are Star Keepers, unfortunately… but the first spell I can teach you is a basic mind control spell.”

The room fell silent. They all thought that the idea of controlling people’s minds was kind of creepy.

But Max had a smile on his face. “Don’t… even… think… about… it!” Becky said sternly.

“I can be even MORE in charge than when Danny originally put me here!” Max argued.

“If you do,” Dan threatened, “I can always demote you to ‘Mister Food Feeder Man’.” That made Max shut up.

Mattison closed his eyes and mumbled a few words to deactivate his magical abilities. After all, he didn’t want to be thinking bad thoughts about the new Keepers while saying a mind control spell.

“To unlock your powers,” he said, “you must say the word for ‘key’, which is ‘koroma’, followed by the word for mind control, ‘kodozi’.”

The children repeated. Mattison suddenly looked very stiff. His eyes were opened very wide, and his pupils were contracted. He blinked and said “I… am… just… kidding!” then giggled a little bit.

“However, Max needs to work a little more on it; it was not yet fully unlocked for him. I will stay here with him, while you two go to confront your parents. Be sure to think of the command so that it can enter your parents’ mind without you saying it out loud to Anta Matzu.”

“We will,” Becky said. She turned to Max and said, “This is work, not torture, okay?”

“Okay!” Max shouted. He felt really misunderstood now; he NEVER thought work was torture! Admittedly he wanted to practice in real life, but he stayed behind anyway.

Uh, yeah, sorry about the spacing, I have now idea how to fix that. What does it mean? Find out in about two weeks!

...Give or take a day!

Oh right, I have a blog.

2010-02-15T18:15:00.000-08:00

Um, yeah, sorry. I have been busy with school (and I was grounded for failure to comply with quizzing rules during finals week). Of course, most of you don't really care.

Oh! But I have an excerpt from my book, which I think you might like:

Ken sighed, leaned in close, and said those words, those cursed words that even he thought no one should ever hear: “I know you’re one of them.”
Sara sighed. “Yes,” she replied. “And I suppose you’re working for the Organization?”
“I don’t want to kill you,” Ken answered. “No, I want to truly love you. I know that if I tell them I saw you, I’ll die… but they use never-failing lie detectors to tell whether or not someone really saw one of you.”
“How do you know that it’s ‘never-failing’?” asked Sara.
“Because,” answered Ken, “I’ve seen it happen. And liars are killed, too. But I would rather have to die for you than have to see you die. If just one kiss—just one little kiss—will kill me, you may as well consider me a dead man now.”
Sara was deep in thought. Then she lowered her voice to a soft whisper, very gentle and calm. “It doesn’t have to be that way,” she assured Ken. “Neither of us has to die. I can work it out; all you need to do is look at me…”

This is from a NEW book that is NOT RELATED IN ANY WAY to the Book of Secrets series (more on that later). I have no title for this one; that I can save for later.

I'll try to post more ideas more often (if I have none, I'll just say that). All right, see ya later, everyone!

-Johnny

Welcome!

2010-01-03T14:11:00.000-08:00

I am your host, Johnny Swanson. This is a blog where you can check out how I'm coming along on my books. Currently, I have four planned (yes, four), but I am only working on one due to the wonders of high school and homework. I chose to title this blog based on the one book that I have a title for, which you will find out about later, once I work more on it.

Oh yes, and my sister helps me with a lot of this stuff. She and I are really, really close, as well as we both love fantasy (not to mention we REALLY love writing).

Here are five things you must know about me:

1. I am fifteen years old. Sometimes I word things really badly.

2. I am a beginning writer; my writing style is still coming out, or something (again with the wording things badly!).

3. Yes, I am on the Autism Spectrum; can we move on?

4. I get very offended by the use of the word "retard". So, uh... don't call me a retard. OKAY?

5. I have a life outside of the internet. I tend to call this life "school work". I also have a life that I call a "part-time job". So don't be surprised if I don't update this blog very much.

RULES:

* Use little to no profanity.

* Don't call me or any of my friends "retards".

* Don't insult me or any of my friends period.

* No spam.

** This includes chain letters, "check out my blog", "visit this website", etc.

* Any criticism should be constructive.

** For example, instead of just saying "Your books suck!", because I know they suck, tell me how I should improve them.

* Any user who intentionally breaks these rules WILL BE BLOCKED.

You have been warned.